Underneath...

I walk around smiling.

People smile back.

Friends talk to me.

I do what I have to do,

Though it's not enough.

A smile that covers the pain,

The sorrow,

The screaming.

The warmth is crawling up, 

I can't stop it.

Then it all pulls together,

A ball of pain.

I feel like I'm dying,

Slowly, painfully.

The ball of pain keeps pushing and pushing,

Till finally I give up.

I'm scared,

It hurts so bad.

Just when I think it can't get any worse,

The ball of pain explodes!

It bursts into flames and hits the walls.

It destroys everything in it's way.

Now I'm numb,

But only for a second.

Then the pain feels like it's tearing me apart from inside,

I can't breathe.

Help me!

I start to scream till my lungs collapse.

The pain has taken over,

It won't stop.

No ending.

Underneath I'm crying.

Underneath I'm screaming.

Underneath I'm torn apart.

Underneath I'm numb.

I have to hide it.

Underneath, underneath, underneath. 

Written by Sascha Dollard

06.11.13